2nd sis--killing pill

If this is facebook, then my emoticon will be "dilemma"
It reads...."Jocelynn Tian Li Chieh is in dilemma now..."

Hmm...Talk to second sis just now through msn....
Once i off, cried and cried...
I dunno wad's wrong to me, just feel that i'm so useless....
I cant give my parents the happiness like Gladys's have....
I'm not top student, so......my results considered not good?
I dont think so..I noe this result is good enough...just that it doesnt fulfill my family's expectation?
Mum is always the one supporting me....She cried silently behind me, worrying bout my future without letting me know it...
But she doesnt know, as her child for past 17 years, i've known her well enough to realise the tears on her cheeks....
"Mum, sorry....Millions of sorry...."
Dad is the one kept complaining, but when it comes to me, he's really so kind....I dont know why too....Dad loves me so much....Since young, whatever i wan, well, something reasonable of course, he will buy for me.....Like any other ppl, he always asks me to eat....afraid that i'm in gastric...
My future, seems like not in my decision, but is fully organised and well-arranged by them...They worked so hard....I know...

2nd sis is always the one who makes me realised the bad Jocelynn...the useless one....
I cant control myself when talking to her....
She simply has the power to make me cry loudly and angry....
U wan laptop first? Let u....
When i was still a small baby, i was taught to respect u...not to quarrel wif u...
And when i grown up, i realised that EVERYONE at home seems like afraid of u....
Though i'm always angry...but when u're nice, i love it so much...
When u din talk to me, i'll surely talk to u first...i just dun like the feelings of hating other ppl whom i have to live with everyday...




-Mogu-